Motivational Work

13. The Aggressive Contact Rebus

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Solution of the rebus: I adore you

One of the typical features of the latently motivated is his resistance to change; he shuns contact with the motivational worker and defends himself against development forces. His resistance appears strong and able to negate all attempts at treatment, cooperation, and constructive influence. One such defense is the aggressive contact rebus.

From an emotional perspective, the client’s defensiveness is the most difficult thing for the motivational worker. His unreceptiveness and emotional distance convey a powerful negative confirmation of the motivational worker’s efforts. Therefore, it is of critical importance how the latter perceives defense and resistance, as it is also his primary working material.

Indirect Contact

The fundamental tenet of the theory that will now be expounded upon is that the prime purpose of all forms of defense and resistance is as an indirect means of making contact.

Henceforth, such an indirect communication strategy will be termed a “contact rebus”, a rebus meaning a puzzle comprising pictures, words, and letters that together can be decoded into a particular word or phrase (Motivational Work, Part 1: Values and Theory pages 94 – 159). In this post, we will focus on the aggressive contact rebus.

The Case Study

The following story was related to the author upon meeting one of his students: a female social worker and contact person for a 36-year-old male client, Erik.

Erik, the client, has a long history of alcohol and drug abuse and is an imposing figure of a man, well-known for his violent tendencies. The social worker has been in contact with Erik for a while but has sensed a great emotional distance.

Lifts Her Up

One day, when they walk across the town square together (the social worker is helping Erik with some task), he suddenly lifts her in the air and holds her there with his arms outstretched. Being petite, the social worker dangles freely without touching the ground. Erik starts shouting at the social worker, criticizing her with very offensive language, and a crowd of people soon gathers around them.

The social worker understands that the onlookers interpret what they see as a lover’s quarrel rather than a dispute between a social worker and her client. Accordingly, she cannot count on receiving any help from them. At that moment, the social worker recalls the course in motivational work that she attended: what did Revstedt say about this? Yes, contact rebuses, she thinks to herself.

Sets Her Down

The social worker feels that something has changed in their interaction: they have established contact. She then looks at Erik and says to him: “You aren’t angry, are you?” “No,” he replies, setting her down. It seems that Erik’s attack of rage has disappeared as quickly as it appeared, and they leave the town square together.

After this incident, her client has the courage to draw closer to her and demonstrates greater confidence in her than before. He does not act in a threatening way toward her again.

Discussion of the Aggressive Contact Rebus

Solution of the Rebus

The interaction between Erik and his social worker can be seen as an example of how the latter successfully responds to his aggressive, threatening, and distancing behavior, that is, his aggressive contact rebus. His testing requires the social worker to understand that Erik does, in fact, want to establish contact and receive help.

He is subconsciously investigating whether, despite his threatening behavior, the social worker will still feel concerned for him. This means Erik is looking for someone he has the confidence to lean on and open up to – a refuge in the storm. If the social worker consistently shows positive commitment and does not become afraid when distancing occurs in the relationship, this is a sign she is someone he can trust.

A General Theory

The contact rebus theory is not only useful therapeutically; it is a universally applicable concept of human behavior that lends itself to other contexts of human interaction, i.e., between lovers.

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